Sometimes I have to hand it to the writers of Sex and the City because occasionally they really do hit the nail on the head. Often the writing reduced the characters to caricatures instead of real people, the story lines are dated or oversimplified, and the relationships are unrealistic.
But sometimes it’s the right idea. (even if some of the details get a little messy) And despite the fact that it’s not perfect, I admit I still enjoy it.
Thanks to all the reruns on TV, I can enjoy re-watching it over and over again and realize that some things are incredibly timeless.
There is an episode that explores women’s relationships with each other. Sometimes we have women in our lives that make us feel awful about ourselves. Maybe we think they are a little more perfect than we are. Maybe we think they have something we don’t.
And that can be an awful shame spiral that sends us deep down into a dark places.
Jealousy is an awful feeling. Jealousy is coming from a place that feels powerless. You have given your power to someone else and you are convinced that what they have is better than what you have.
But jealousy isn’t real. If nothing else, it is pointing to something that is really important to you- what you are jealous of is probably something that is important enough to you to want it. You can channel the energy into be the best version of yourself.
And if nothing else, it is an opportunity to remind yourself that you need to be kind to yourself.
I went to a lecture about being true to yourself in business and in life. And often in business you feel like you’re not far enough along, like you should be making more money, or that you’re not good enough as an entrepreneur.
And she dropped this nugget of wisdom. “Curiosity didn’t kill the cat. Comparison did.”
It is so true.
When we compare ourselves to others we are lessening our own power and dimming our own light.
We are wonderful exactly as we are. Another person has nothing to do with your light. You are who you are for a reason, and there are people that are going to see exactly who you are and they are going to value exactly that.
People that don’t value who you are aren’t worth your time. People will choose the people that they value to be in their life.
If someone else finds value elsewhere there is no need to be jealous of that. Hopefully they all find what makes them happy, and I hope you know that you will find what makes you happy. And it wasn’t that.
Being true to who you are and being your best self is the only important goal in your day to day life. It’s not about becoming someone else because you think they’re better.
You are special. No matter how many shiny perfect other women are out there. They’re fighting their own hard battle (which has nothing to do with you) and their existence doesn’t make you less special.