I believe in being honest, completely honest. I wrote some ideas down for posts and some full posts a few days ago, but because of the holiday I didn’t post them right away. They’re a little rant-y. I apologize that some of the posts you will get over the next week are probably out of order.
So you’re going to see a post in a few days about my frustration with hope. Today I am going to be a lot more optimistic.
Something for everyone! Hooray!
I’ve been a little grumpy in my head lately, mostly because I am a freelancer and I have always imagined that I would create a life that I have designed and I work hard to help people and do work that fires me up.
I’ve been trying to do this for several years. I’ve tried working a corporate job while doing my passion on the side. I leapt without a net and pursued my passion, thinking that hard work and passion would be enough. And it’s not there yet, it’s just… so… hard.
Ok, enough of the downer crap.
Shockingly (maybe not, maybe I should have known I was missing something) there is a better way to do all this.
I am reading an incredible book called Choose Yourself. I am a self-help junkie (have you noticed this about me yet?) and I read constantly. Most self help books open your mind, but give very little practical advice that you can put into action. Choose Yourself has already given plenty of useable tips, and I am not even a quarter of the way through.
The book is usually recommended as a career book, but I cannot think of anything better for relationship and life advice as well. Holy moly, I can choose myself, and not care if anyone else ever chooses me? (funny thing about the universe, and this goes with many other books about metaphysics, is that when you choose yourself others can’t help but choose you, too)
This may be particularly challenging advice for women especially. Women naturally respond to being chosen. Mat Boggs, a fantastic relationship expert and researcher of relationships, found that women are extremely responsive to being “chosen.”A guy chooses you over others, he choose to provide for you. Back in the day, being chosen meant that you were going to survive, you wouldn’t be left to your own devices to provide for yourself.
We don’t need this so much anymore, but women still have the natural instinct to enjoy being chosen.
I digress a little. The concept of choosing yourself means that you hold yourself responsible for lighting your own internal fire. You must build your foundation in the physical, spiritual, mental and emotional bodies.
What I have been missing for so long, in so many of these areas, is that I am not lighting MY OWN FIRE. I am expecting the outside world to light my fire.
So I get stuck in an endless cycle,beating my head into the pavement over and over. I run and work really hard for something- a man, a cause, a job, a dream. And I expect that X Factor to fill me up and excite me.
Things don’t turn out how we expect them. I find some level of success or I get only so far towards my dream and it is like I am hitting a huge brick wall. I can’t get any further.
I cannot stress how big of a lightbulb moment this is for me.
And I hit that wall because I get burnt out- I have pushed so hard to get the outside world to look the way I want it. And so things get knocked back to square one.
And I get SO TIRED. It’s a constant fight and I never understand why.
I haven’t lit my own fire. No one else will light it for me, I am the only one that can do that.
This book has already been so helpful, I am positive I will be writing about it more. And I have a new perspective now,so those out of order posts I wrote about may get posted, maybe not. Maybe I will add new notes and new perspectives since many of my frustrations are voiced here and have changed.
One of the frustrations in my life is when we all walk around with dead eyes- like zombies trying to just get through the day. I wish there was something I could do to help. Something to help bring the life back. I think it would be a better world if we could just bring the life back to our eyes. This may be an important step in that direction.
Have you had any lightbulb moments in your life recently? What has been turning you on? Share in the comments below! Share this post on Facebook or Twitter, I’d love to hear from as many people as possible about this topic.